Acceptance

It's taken a long road to finally accept myself and the journey to get to this point has been challenging.

I have been following and talking to my now coach/mentor for a while and finally started sessions with them. I wasn't expecting too much, I mean it was a first session. But what I got was powerful and I'm going to share some feelings from that. (Alex website) Connecting with Alex has helped me realise my worth.

This last week was a start of a new dawn for me , I say this as the feeling I had following my 1st session. I felt and feel strong. 
Saying goodbye to the word stupid in regards to me and embracing 8 year old CHé in a hug was powerful. Yes I did this.

I was told I was stupid growing up for believing I was a boy, for not being as academic as my twin brother and allegedly troublesome. How many times I heard the word stupid in reference to myself led me to take on that word and own it. Maybe I did this to bury my true feelings,  be accepted and fit in an already difficult situation I basically accepted I was stupid and CHé was hidden.

I have spoken to my younger self since and hugged them many times following this session, I am not stupid, I have always known myself.
I love little CHé for being so strong and resilient and doing what they needed to self protect. I love myself for being true now, although hard and I have lost things on the way, those losses are not sorrows but openings for other things.

I don't feel alone in myself anymore as I have me. Yes the intrusive thoughts may still be present, but am I defined by the negativity, NO. Sometimes we need some help to reframe. Alex has helped CHé big and little become united again and lose some shackles to the past.

We have one life, let's embrace it and be true to ourselves. 




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