Trigger response

Ever felt triggered by a person's response and reaction.
Yeah me too.

I was recently triggered by how a person responded to me regarding my pronouns. It was not a pleasant experience, it was a challenge and how I reacted was not how I wish to moving forward.

Reflection is a wonderful thing, and when you have a coach that helps you to reframe, it assists you to unlock what is within.

Internalised transphobia from old me to present me was what I felt. It impacted me so great what that person said, because I used to say those things about myself. It doesn't make it ok, it doesn't make it easy to understand why I did that but I am learning.
I'm learning that I was protecting little CHé, that we were protecting me in the way I knew best, by following the lead and running away. Now I'm not running but listening to myself.
I'm acknowledging the past, my processes of learning however hurtful they were.

I am not that person anymore, I am CHé , a trans guy who loves himself for being me. Loves himself for being true.

Those who don't understand, they don't need to understand transitioning, all I ask is for some dignity and respect. However, I know I can ask but it doesn't mean they will give it so I will not expect this from anyone. I can't change how others see me, I can help educate them and myself , but change comes from within, a person must want change to accept change 

With that , I accept my internalised transphobia was self protection, self hate, dysphoria. 
But I am no longer that person and I'm here to celebrate life , my life as CHé, the person I have always been but for whatever reason could not be.

The rollercoaster ride of life is one I'm learning to enjoy. Becoming more self aware is self love. I'm beginning to love myself, it's not always easy but with the ups and downs of a rollercoaster I don't expect a plateau.

I can't urge readers enough to look within, see their potential and do something about it. If you do one thing for yourselfthink about getting a coach, here's a link to mine, ( Alex - CHé Coach) . I'm not saying it's easy, I'm not saying Alex will be the right fit for everyone, I am saying he has helped me and I can feel the change within.  🫂

Let's raise from the fire and embrace the lives we have. 💜


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

TRIGGER WARNING

6 months on T , the reality

Transgender, what it means to me.